The only difference of the love in heaven from love on earth below Is:
Here we love and know not how to tell it, and there we all shall know

Wednesday, 1 May

It was a happy visit. Alex had already made his mind up to spend his country-in visits with me. I’d asked him whether or not he’d succeed in flying his son up. He didn’t think it’d present a problem. I spent time with his parents. I felt at home. There was a little upset. Alex had left one evening without any explanation. His parents and I were very surprised.

“What are you doing?” “Another hour and I’d have left. Your parents would’ve understood.” “Here, smell my breath. I haven’t been drinking. I had to see to business and I did excuse myself early.” He’d thought his mother and I would’ve discouraged him from leaving had he told us the truth. He’d needed to discuss the DRC option with his contacts. “If you can’t be honest, I’ll walk away. You could’ve told me the truth.” He’d begun to laugh. He came to call me a while later. “Are you going to make me suffer?” His father had gone to bed and his mother sat watching TV. I fell asleep while we were watching videos. After the videos, he’d sat at his laptop and forwarded the mail. I received it on my return home. I told him the next day he needn’t have worried: I’d have respected his choice.

I found out Alex had had a relationship with a woman doctor in Tanzania. “I guess I was infatuated.” She’d disappointed him: she’d thought he was cheating on her and had made him jealous. It’d come to blows. He keeps a photo: he is lying on a hospital bed with a drip. They’re both laughing. She’d asked to see him during her country-in visit to her parents. Alex thought to make his excuses. “Is it over?” I’d asked him often. He’d gotten irritated: he’d already answered the question. “Yes.”